Wednesday, April 24, 2013

The usual flow of life

In between the usual flow of life and the things that must be done like eating and making the bed, washing the dishes, walking to the tram stop, chatting briefly to people that I know in the shops and cafes, taking a breathe in and out and my own private thoughts and returning home, preparing food and undertaking other domestic tasks, I sit and draw. I've not seen a film since I saw Amour at the end of February this year and it was so painful for me to watch that I was flung into a depression that I couldn't quite understand. Oh sure, I understood my depression from an intellectual point of view - I was responding to the film and had personalized the experience I'd seen on screen, but there was deep in my psyche an ache that couldn't be fathomed and I needed to delve deep and find a space that provided comfort.  My challenge around about mid March was to make one drawing day per day and I've managed to do that except for the two days that I was extremely busy around the time of my Birthday. After having proved to myself that I can indeed produce these small works I have decided to just keep making without imposing the one per day task upon myself, which in itself could become a burden. It's been a difficult time for many people over the past few weeks, but it is difficult too for those of us who have had to watch various disasters played out on our television and Internet screens for we too are reminded of the possible suddenness of terror and the way that things can so quickly change. We are reminded of our own fragility and the preciousness of life and health and it is with this in mind that we must continue each day with our personal struggles, the joy and pain of life.

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