Monday, August 9, 2010

Order/Chaos

Brevity is warranted here, for too many ideas fill my mind. Suffice to say that every time I feel I have things ordered and manageable, life has a way of throwing things up in the air ~ creating chaos, as if to show that things are really not in my control, that there are other forces in play of which I have no agency. I have to believe amidst all this insecurity I've been experiencing of late, that the universe, which is shuffling and dealing out its bizarre and alienating hand, is, in the end, ultimately conspiring in my favor. I remind myself today to listen to my higher self and to consider the big picture ~ no use in perceiving this moment as bad, when it may be revealed later as good and necessary for growth or some other unveiled purpose. I will be settled again. But until then, I sift through the memories of my life ~ sort, file, discard, preparing to move on to the next chapter.

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